I was in marching band throughout all of my high This Girl Runs On Jesus Coffee And Running Shirt and college days. Back then, I really liked the Canadian Brass. I had a couple of their CDs and just really enjoyed their sound. They were coming to my town to put on a concert, and I scored a couple of tickets by committing to $10/month for a year to my local NPR station. Eventually she said something like, “Let’s blow off this concert and go back to my place.” Me, being a 19 or 20 year old dude, was like, “Ok!’ But the nerd in me still wished I could watch the concert. Sex vs music… hmmmm… Tough choice. So, we go back to her place, and she does the whole “I’m going to change into something more comfortable” bit. She comes out in flannel PJ bottoms and a T-shirt, her bra still on. I’m still sitting there in my suit pants, shirt, and tie. She then says, “I hope you know, I’m not going to fuck you. I just didn’t want to sit through some boring concert.” I was like, “Ok, cool… yeah… I wasn’t expecting you to.” She said, “Want some weed? Let’s play cards.” I was like, sounds fun.
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I hate weed – I hate the feeling of the high – but I This Girl Runs On Jesus Coffee And Running Shirt a bit and we played gin for a couple of hours. I couldn’t remember what cards I had after just looking at them, so I did terrible. When I finally felt ok enough to drive home, I left. A deer jumped out in front of me a couple of miles from her house and dented my hood. This was 25+ years ago, and I still kick myself for not seeing the Jesus over some girl I never saw again and didn’t get so much as a hug from. I pre-ordered two drinks like normal. She shows up, she orders a ton of expensive items and drinks, all the time she is on her phone. I think the bill was around 350 but I already paid my part so I walked out through the back and ghosted. My friend did this, his date ordered a lot of expensive drinks and dishes and she didn’t even touch any of them just took photos and posted them on her socmed. My friend just fucked off and came back to the restaurant a week later and the same waiter told him what happened when Jesus left.
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